On the Cusp

Here we are – New Year’s Eve 2021 – the cusp of a new year. For me, that’s only one.

I’m on the cusp of a new job. I start on Monday. A year ago, I was in the same position – starting a new role in January. It was never my intention to leave it so soon but, when the Universe hands you a dream job, well… what can I say? I wasn’t actively looking for work, it just kind of happened. I like to think of it as the Universe’s gift to me for all I went through last year.

I’m on the cusp of a new relationship with my son. While I was in Mexico, he stayed at my place with his dog to get out of the house. He’s never left. He’s chosen to live with me full-time. Even though “Mom” requires him to help with the housework, he has a much smaller bedroom, and he needs to cook the occasional meal, he’s happier here. His anxiety is non-existent and he no longer has a variety of aches and pains in this body. I knew my relationship with my ex was toxic for me; turns out it was toxic for him after I left.

He doesn’t spend all his time in his room anymore. Partly, I think, because I have a firm “only water upstairs” rule, so he needs to come downstairs to eat. 🙂 It’s giving us time to talk and get to know each other as adults. It’s a tough transition at times. In my heart, he’s always my little boy. I’m starting to reframe my thinking to see the young man before me. For him, he starting to see “mom” as her own person – who she is outside of the role of “mom” and “wife”. As much as I thought we could never live together harmoniously, I find I quite enjoy his company.

I’m on the cusp of a home renovation. I have an empty room downstairs that’s currently being used for storage and laundry. It’s going to become a bedroom with a 3/4 bath for my son. I’ve never undertaken a project like this on my own. All the decisions (and the expense!) will be mine. I’m currently at the stage of choosing a contractor.

I’m trying to think of anything else I’m undertaking at the moment. I think that’s it.

There’s excitement being on the verge of something. After so many endings in 2021, I suppose it’s only natural to be faced with beginnings for 2022. My corporate mind goes to Tuckmans’ Stages of Group Development – storming, forming, norming, performing. I feel it applies to individuals, too.

2020 was my year of storming. 2021 saw me forming and norming. For 2022, I am on the cusp of continuing to find my norm and truly start to perform.

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