11:11

During our trip to Maui, and ever since, I’ve encountered the numbers 11:11 quite frequently. I knew there was significance to this, so I did some research. This is what I’ve learned.

  • It’s a clear message from the universe to become conscious and aware
  • It tells me I’m on the right path and my actions are aligned with my soul’s purpose
  • I’m being guided to grow and expand
  • I’m being asked to tune into the present moment
  • I need to engage more deeply in the mystery and wonder of existence
  • It’s indicative of a spiritual awakening
  • It’s about new things and new beginnings
  • It’s time to start manifesting what I want in my life

If I’ve learned anything in the past year, its that the universe gives me what I need at the time. Seeing these numbers now is no coincidence.

Hawai’i, and Maui specifically, is a place where I truly resonate with my surroundings. I become very reflective and introspective. It’s where my soul speaks to me. This time, I spent my time there with someone who also marvels at the mysteries of the universe and I think it made the experience even more profound for me. I was able to expand my thoughts rather than have them ridiculed and diminished.

I also received a clear message from my Mom while there. Ever since her death, Mom has been leaving dimes for me. I hadn’t seen one in quite a while. I was at a store and saw some salt water taffy. I immediately thought, “Mom would love this”, before I remembered she’s dead. When I walked out of the store, a shiny dime was waiting on the ground. Mom heard me. She’s been a frequent visitor to my dreams lately, too. I know she’s trying to tell me something but I haven’t figured it out yet.

In some ways, it’s odd to be getting signs of new beginnings now. You’d think I’d have received them last year when I moved out of the marital home and bought my own place. What signals a new beginning more than a home purchase as a single person?

Apparently, for me, it was the purchase of a new-to-me vehicle. I traded in my existing vehicle two days ago. It was the last physical tie to a toxic relationship. I pick up my new car tonight.

Why is this purchase so liberating? I believe it’s because:

  • I did it on my own
  • I bought what I *wanted*, rather than what I *needed*
  • I’m paying cash

There’s a sense of freedom with this. It’s been over 30 years since I’ve made a big purchase on my own. This time, I didn’t have to factor in cargo room for dog showing or hauling kids around and settling for a vehicle that fits the need. It’s the first time I’ve had the resources to pay cash and not be tied to payments.

In the spirit of new beginnings and listening to my soul’s purpose, I have reclaimed my birth name. As of today, I am no longer Sharon Doyle, but Sharon Papish.

It’s time, as Sharon Papish, to take my life in direction I’m guided. I need to pay attention to the opportunities presented to me and stay grounded in the present. I am full of gratitude for everything I have – family, friends, relationship, home, job – and feel I’m on the cusp of even more abundance.

The universe is asking for my attention. It has it.

Missing…but in Action

I have good intentions about blogging regularly, and then…life.

My son, Nathan, stayed at my place while Martin and I were in Mexico. After two weeks, he realized his anxiety was non-existent and his hypochondria was greatly reduced. He asked if he and his dog could move in with me permanently. Nathan had enough of dealing with his step-dad and living in a toxic environment. The ex’s boyfriend made it clear he wanted me and my son out of HIS house a few months ago (I wasn’t living there!).

Little did we know, having Nathan “out of sight” also meant he was “out of mind”. My ex had his family over for Christmas and didn’t invite Nathan. He’s always said helping to raise Nathan is his proudest accomplishment – but, no Christmas? Not even a gift. My ex gave his cleaning lady a gift, but not his son. When Nathan talked to him about it, the response was, “Oh, I didn’t think we were doing that this year.” He never asked. He didn’t want Nathan there because the truth might come out. You can bet his boyfriend and the boyfriend’s dog weren’t at the house the same time as his family.

Sorry, I tend to rant when I think of that man…

Nathan is now wrestling with, “I thought he cared about me.” He will be getting counselling to help him deal with it.

So, to give me and my son some privacy, I’ve decided to finish the downstairs room in my condo. He will have his own bedroom and half-bath. I reached out to four contractors. Two came to see the place, and only one came through with a quote. We’re now in the waiting game of getting a development permit from the city. I spent last week developing drafting skills as the basement plans had to be drawn to scale. Grade 8 math came in handy!

Then, I started a new job at the start of January. I absolutely love it. It challenges my brain in a way it hasn’t been used in a long time. The work day passes very quickly. By the end of it, I’m exhausted. Mentally exhausted. It’s all I can do to get to the gym 4-5 times a week. When I get home, I barely have the energy to make dinner before falling asleep on the couch.

I’ve decided to learn Spanish this year, so spend 15 minutes a night using Duolingo. I’ve got a 42 day streak going and am determined to see it grow to 365 days. Learning Spanish has been on my “to do” list for a few years and the recent vacation reignited the interest.

There’s been more dealings with the ex regarding his lover’s dog biting Nathan, dealing with animal control, deciding what to do with Nathan’s car, getting the divorce finalized and organizing our trip to Maui in February. There doesn’t seem to be enough hours in the day.

I’m confident things will settle down this year. Nathan’s bedroom will get finished. I can arrange my living area the way I want. The divorce will be finalized (hopefully!) and the ex will be forever out of our lives. I’ll build the endurance so a full day of work doesn’t make me want to nap at the end of the day.

So, yeah…I’ve been missing from here, but am still definitely in action.

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